Beer, Turtles, and Pidgin English

We’ve vacillated between action and inaction on this trip. We wake up pretty early and take a beach walk and then snorkel and swim. We came out of the water the other day and a couple of people on the beach were all excited about the turtle trailing us while we snorkeled. We had no idea. The next two times we went out we saw it. Terri (Clay’s daughter) is one of those research people who finds the best snorkeling spot in a ten-mile radius, so we headed out with her one morning to south of Wailea. The parking lot seemed to be for fishermen and was basically wedged into the trees and sand. We walked a little south and saw a group of snorkelers, so we headed that way. What a jackpot! We saw at least six turtles, and the water was much clearer than our beach. I’ve never seen turtles that mellow before. They just paddled around the snorkelers, probably looking for a handout. One old-timer was playing chicken with Joe. It swam right up to Joe’s face… at the last second it went around. We even saw an eel swimming around! That’s not something you usually see accept on night dives.

We’ve been on a quest to find the best beer brewery. We went to Maui brewery for dinner. I was amazed at how enormous that place was. It had to be on at least a couple of acres. Most of the time we hang out here at Sugar Beach and grab an occasional drink or bite to eat at Dina’s Sand Witch. I’d read that Eskimo Candy had the best fish and chips. Though it was good, I wouldn’t say it’s the best. Then again, I was raised in California. We got one Mahi and one Ono basket. The Mahi was flakier and the Ono was firm. Us girls went into Lahaina the other day and wore ourselves out shopping. We went to Waikiki Brewery for lunch. Terri, the connoisseur, preferred Waikiki over Maui. I got a pumpkin beer because I was hot. It was okay… it might have been better if it was ice cold.

I’ve been obsessed with puzzles on this trip. I’m already on my third one. Clay will come over and help me sometimes. Right now I’m doing one with a bunch of surfers from around the world lined up in front of their boards.

Above us, in this resort, is a young couple with a big dog. It’s generally a quiet dog, but the other night it sounded like it was chasing a mouse around their condo! I could hear it skidding around corners and barking like a maniac. I couldn’t hear any humans, so I have no idea what it was after. That was an earplug night. For daytime entertainment we have the guy in a condo below us who starts his day by doing a vocal workout. You know, the la-la-la in different pitches? He absolutely does not have a singing voice, but he faithfully works his voice from his balcony every morning. :/

On a cultural note; the Hawaiians are pretty laid back, but I found something that almost universally pisses them off (it’s a super-power of mine). They do NOT like it when you speak Spanish to them. This is super hard for us Californians. We often say hola or gracias. They will flat out say, “We don’t speak Spanish here!” Okie-dokie. Even if I catch myself and apologize before they can say something, they’ll still tell me to not speak Spanish. Last night our bartender, a very nice Hawaiian woman, explained that Ola is a name here. It means pride or proud or something. Her excuse is that she thinks people are mistaking her for her cousin. I’m not buying it.

Today is super windy. We usually eat out on our balcony, but today I had to save our placemats twice from going over the railing. I’m sure I looked comical to the sensible people in the other condos as I raced around in circles trying to pin down placemats and napkins. The problem is I leave the front door open and it created a wind tunnel today. I closed the door and picked up all the puzzle pieces from the floor. Not a shining moment for me.

The aquarium here has a giant gift shop inside, but it’s a process to get in there. First you have to pay to park… call me petty, but it irritates me to pay to spend money. It’s two bucks an hour and you have to pay it buy texting a number and inputting a number, or you can hold your camara to the QR code. Then once you finally get inside, you have to go to the ticket counter and sign in and they give you a wristband to make sure you don’t sneak into the aquarium. Surprisingly, the shop wasn’t overpriced. That’s something, right? There’s also a small outdoor mall next to the aquarium in case you want to spend more money.

I found one of the coolest things at the gift shop… a Hawaiian Pidgin-English Bible. It is called Da Good An Spesho Book. I couldn’t resist picking it up and reading it. I went to the most familiar verse, John 3:16-17. I love it! “God get plenny love an aloha fo da peopo inside da world. Dass why he sen me, his one and ony Boy. Cuz a dat, erybody dat trus me no goin get cut off from God foeva! Dey goin get da real kine life dat goin stay to da max foeva! You know, wen God sen me, his Boy, inside da world, he neva do dat fo punish da peopo. He sen me fo get da peopo outa da bad kine stuff dey stey do.” Interesting huh?